Let me sound one note of warning. Neither families nor doctors like to make life-death decisions. But there is no question that if either party insists on bringing in a so-called "neutral" third party usually some representative of the state or legal profession, not only will the process take longer, in many instances it will be more arbitrary and less sympathetic. What we are trying to avoid is neutrality; the only people with any qualification to decide are those who know the patient intimately and can put his or her interests first. If there's one place from which the interference of lawyers and government officials should be barred, it's from the rooms of critically ill patients.