有合適的職位再通知

“We’ll be sure to keep your resume on hand for future opportunities!”
“我們會(huì)保留你的簡歷，將來有合適的職位再通知你?！?/strong>

No you won’t. You deleted this email thread 5 seconds after you sent this email. You emptied my resume into your trash bin and quoted parts of my cover letter to your employees over lunch to make them laugh.
不，你們不會(huì)的。你發(fā)好這封郵件后馬上就刪了。我的簡歷被扔進(jìn)垃圾桶，你們茶余飯后還會(huì)取笑我求職信里的內(nèi)容。

很多人跟你的情況相同

“A lot of people are in the same position as you are!”
“很多人跟你們的情況相同?！?/strong>

I believed you until I turned on the TV and saw all the teenagers in the commercials for the upcoming winter olympics.
我相信你們的話，直到我看電視看到冬奧會(huì)廣告里的少年們。

看每封求職信和簡歷

“We really value all of our applicants and take time to observe each letter and resume carefully!”
“我們重視每個(gè)申請(qǐng)者，而且花時(shí)間仔細(xì)看每封求職信和簡歷。”

No you don’t.
你們才不會(huì)呢。

會(huì)有更好的職位等著你

“This is just opening the path for something better to come along!”
“這只是開始，會(huì)有更好的職位等著你。”

If by better you mean deferring student loans and picking up applications from Starbucks and Subway…then yes.
如果“更好”是說借不到學(xué)生貸款以及去星巴克和地鐵站打工的話，你們沒說錯(cuò)。

很難做決定

“We had so many candidates- it was a TOUGH decision.”
“候選人太多——做決定很困難?！?/strong>

You knew who you were going to hire when you interviewed me.
你們給我面試的時(shí)候就想好要不要聘用我了。

我們都經(jīng)歷過你的情況

“We’ve all been in your situation before.”
“我們都經(jīng)歷過你的情況?！?/strong>

You started with this company as an intern during your senior year…
你大四的時(shí)候就在這家公司當(dāng)實(shí)習(xí)生了啊……

會(huì)很快通知你

“We’ll make a decision soon and let you know!”
“我們會(huì)很快做好決定通知你?！?/strong>

It’s been 6 months…
已經(jīng)6個(gè)月沒消息了……

鼓勵(lì)再次申請(qǐng)

“We encourage to reapply!”
“我們鼓勵(lì)求職者再次申請(qǐng)?！?/strong>

When I emailed you several months later about another position you never replied...
幾個(gè)月后我發(fā)郵件問其他職位的情況，你們沒回復(fù)我啊……

職位不招人了

“This position has been cancelled.”
“職位不招人了?！?/strong>

Oh.
呵呵。