Funny Inspirational Quotes
有趣的勵(lì)志名言

1. “Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.” – Oscar Wilde“
跟悲觀主義的人借錢吧。他不會(huì)指望你會(huì)還錢?！薄獖W斯卡?王爾德[/cn

2. “First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.” – Steve Martin“
[cn]首先醫(yī)生告訴我一個(gè)好消息：有一種疾病將以我的名字命名。”——史蒂夫?馬丁[/cn

3. “People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.” – Isaac Asimov“
[cn]那些以為自己什么都知道的人對于確實(shí)知道的我們來說是巨大的煩惱。”——艾薩克?阿西莫夫[/cn

4. “Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out it alive.” – Elbert Hubbard“
[cn]別對生活太認(rèn)真了，否則你將永遠(yuǎn)無法活著逃出去。”——阿爾伯特?哈伯德[/cn

5. “The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets.” – Al McGuire“
[cn]生活中唯一的謎團(tuán)是為什么神風(fēng)特攻隊(duì)的飛行員要戴著頭盔?！薄瑺?麥奎爾[/cn

6. “Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.” – Dave Barry“
[cn]任何情況下都不要在同一個(gè)晚上同時(shí)服用安眠藥和瀉藥?！薄鞣?巴里[/cn

7. “If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments.” – Flip Wilson“
[cn]如果你認(rèn)為沒有人在意你是否活著，那就試著躲債?！薄评?威爾遜[/cn

8. “A woman’s mind is cleaner than a man’s: She changes it more often.” – Oliver Herford“
[cn]女人的思路比男人更清晰：因?yàn)樗齻兏８淖??！薄獖W利弗?黑爾福德[/cn

9. “I intend to live forever. So far, so good.” – Steven Wright“
[cn]我要永遠(yuǎn)活下去，長久又有意義”——史蒂夫?萊特[/cn

10. “Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.” – Unknown“
[cn]沒有什么比在知道是自己做錯(cuò)的情況下還跟別人爭論更糟糕的了?！薄鸞/cn

11. “If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?” – Milton Berle“
[cn]如果人類真的在不斷進(jìn)化，為什么母親只有兩只手？”——米爾頓?伯利[/cn

12. “I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives.” – Unkown“
[cn]我夢想有一個(gè)更加美好的明天，那是一個(gè)小雞能夠過馬路并且不用被質(zhì)疑動(dòng)機(jī)的明天?！薄鸞/cn

13. “When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren’t smart enough to get out of jury duty.” – Norm Crosby“
[cn]當(dāng)你上法庭時(shí)，你將把你的命運(yùn)托付給十二個(gè)不夠聰明以至于無法擺脫陪審員義務(wù)的人手上?！薄?克魯斯比[/cn

14. “To err is human, to blame it on somebody else shows management potential.” – Unkown“
[cn]人非圣賢孰能無過，但把過錯(cuò)推給別人顯示出了一個(gè)人的管理潛力?！薄鸞/cn

15. “The trouble with being punctual is that nobody’s there to appreciate it.” – Franklin P. Jones“
[cn]守時(shí)伴隨著的一個(gè)缺點(diǎn)是沒有人會(huì)欣賞他?！薄惶m克林?瓊斯

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